Sewing disasters.................

We all know I can't sew, so why, oh why, do I keep trying?  I suddenly get the need to dust off my sewing machine, find a pattern and fabric, and then disaster strikes.  I spent every spare moment all weekend making three new shirts.  

Lets take a look shall we?

Exhibit A:

While this doesn't look to bad don't let the picture fool you.  The puffy sleeves make me look like I am a five year old, nothing against five year old's mind you, it is just their clothing is not appropriate for me.  The sleeves reminded me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry has to wear the puffy shirt on TV for an interview.  Gosh I still miss that show.

  

Having nothing to lose I cut off the sleeves and tried to make a sleeveless shirt like my last two.  I cut these three shirts out at the same time, marked then and took great care with everything, I mean really meticulous care and I ended up with two great pieces of sewn fabric, with crazy neck and arm bindings, and gatherers that were too tight.  When I tried it on I looked like I was wearing a racing back shirt, but the racing back ended up being the racing front.  I can't even tell you how ridiculous these are on.  There is no saving them, no donating them, no nothing but putting them in the garbage bin or the fabric pile where I already have a lot of materiel left over from cutting them out..  

Exhibit B:

Love the linen type fabric, cool and breezy but a pain in the you know what to sew on.  It frays, it gathers in weird places and it does not like to be serged.  But really it has to have an over-lock stitch as it frays, and frays, and frays.   Garbage bin here you go, another disaster that really was all my fault.

  I didn't even bother editing these pictures you need to see how pathetic these are in all their real glory.

Exhibit C:

Now how can three shirts cut out and marked all at the same time come out with two that don't fit and one that does?  I hate the binding, my sewing skills stink but I think I could actual wear this one if I wasn't leaving my house.  Of course I will have to get the wee bit of blood out of the neckline where I had cut myself with my rotary cutter without noticing until I saw my very red blood drop on this very white shirt.  Could I have bled on the two that made it in the garbage bin?  Apparently not.   

New Look Pattern 6891 you are officially retired.  I know you say easy in big bold letters but you simply were not that easy for me.  You tempt me with your photo and beautiful adaptations and wooed me in, yet I did not do you justice.  It isn't your fault, I take full responsibility for my sewing disaster.  Just the same I don't want to see you again any time soon.  If I was in my six grade home economics class I think I would have gotten a D on this assignment, well maybe be a C as 3 out of 5 are at least wearable even if I don't dare venture to far in them for fear someone will run pointing at me and screaming, "Homemade! Homemade!  Look people she can't sew!"

I think I need more flower pictures and a good bottle of red wine to calm my frayed nerves.  To bad I don't drink.

I think I am going to stick with playing with yarn, well that is until I am tempted again to dust off my machine and try again.  You see there is just something inside of me that thinks I should be able to do this even if I can't.  I see you all out in blogland making dresses and pants!  I mean pants for Pete's sake and I can't even make a tank top.  I am in awe of you all, and maybe just need to be happy with who I am and that is not someone who sews successfully. 

Hope you are having a more successful week than I am.