Sunday, August 12, 2012

A Gift

Times are stressful here at my house, just like it is for about everyone I know.  Lots and lots of change going on, some you know about and some you don't.  I have never been a fan of change.  I swear I would be sitting here with my kids at the ages of 3 and 6 1/2 for the rest of my life if I was able.  But instead they keep growing and growing, and now moving on.  I know you give them the best years of your life and hope they make the right decisions as they move away from your safe nest.  I have written about change before, it seems to be a reoccurring theme with me.  Maybe if I would embrace it things would be easier.  

On top of all the change occurring in my life I am changing.  As you know Menopause has been kicking my butt.  I have tried the natural way, which is more my style, boy that didn't work.  I have tried supplements, yoga, acupuncture, and meditation. I have tried the pill which has given me an edge to get through the last year, but it isn't working now.  I am now on bio-identical hormones, not seeing a  lot of help in that area either.  Really was puberty this hard?

Sometimes I am not feeling well so my outlook isn't the best.  I get a bit tearful and my fears get the best of me.  That is when I know I need a sign that things will turn out okay.  I think gifts from the Universe come in all forms.  Kind words from a friend that really hit home.  A flower peeking up in the most unexpected place.  A dream with a message from a loved one.  And nature, the unexpected hoot from and owl, a beautiful blue heron passing by, shells and rocks.  

I remember reading in The Secret that these gifts are available if you just ask for them.  Well when I have been walking Max lately I think I have received a few little gifts telling me that things will all work out.  My gifts are in the form of feathers.

 This is my feather haul this year.  The large one on the left might be from a Turkey Vulture, not the most regal of birds but certainly a bird we need to clean up a mess.

 These might be my pride and joy.  I found each feather on three consecutive walks.  These are from a barred owl.  The small one is from the owls body.  The larger ones are from the wings, owls lose the feathers of their wings in pairs, one on each side as a new one develops.  I found one in a puddle, and the other one high up on the grass just waiting for me to pick up, three days apart.  I often hear barrel owls in back of my house in the evening hooting to each other.  Their sounds echo off the land bouncing back to them to tell them if prey in near by.
 Even in Minnesota I found this beauty on the rocky beach.

Two days ago Max and I were walking along on our merry way.  He makes it about a mile away before we have to turn around and head home.  On our path back I found this right in the middle of the sidewalk.  We had just walked by this area and it wasn't there before.  I am not sure what lovely bird left this for me to find, but I appreciate the gesture.

I don't find them on every walk, but I am sure happy when I do. 

Are you finding any gifts lately?


Rose said...

Hang in there! Love the feathers, what nice gifts indeed.

Kris said...

I love to find those gifts of nature too!! Regarding the menopause, I too have been suffering! For 12 years now! I had to have a total hysterectomy at 40. Which threw me right into menopause! The good news is, I have a new female Dr. This year and I was telling her how awful my hot flashes are. She suggested that I try Prozac. I was surprised, being that it is a drug to treat depression, which I am not. But she said that they have had great success treating bad menopausal symptoms with this drug. I said lets do it. It has been almost three months now and I am feeling SO much better. Perhaps you should ask your Dr. about trying it too.

mynestofyarnandbuttons said...

Hi Meredith, Love your special gifts!! I'm also a believer of these kinda signs. I once got a rainbow I believe from my dad who sent it to me in a moment of sadness in my lives journey. So I'm with you!!! As far as menopause I wish you so much sympathy and strength, it not easy.

Anonymous said...

It really is true that the little things in life often mean the most. It is so good that you are able to take those little gifts that many do not notice and take heart in them. Thank you for sharing your happiness with us :) I hope this next week brings you less stress and more peace.

gaia said...

I hope you feel better soon...Gaia.

Jeanmarie DiTaranto said...

Hope menopause becomes meno-STOP real soon. Your positive outlook should be a tremendous help. Best wishes!

Stitchy Mc Floss said...

I am sending you hugs. I hope they find something that will help you thru the menopause soon. :)

Love the feathers!

Hugs to Max and hang in there my friend. :)

lovestitch said...

My hugs to you, too. I really hope you are feeling better...
I'm also sending my late "Happy Birthday" to Max!
Best wishes,

delia hornbook said...

Im so sorry to hear and read you are struggling with things just now. Im like you in that i find things in my every day life to give me a lift and feel like a gift. I was walking through the park this afternoon after a stressful morning and just on leaving i found the most lovely pine cone and i said to my other half as i picked it up it was waiting just for me ;-))Sending you a hug, dee xx

Susanne said...

There are all kinds of things available for a menopausal woman and finding the right one for the right woman may take awhile with trial and error. Back in the day I was feeling just like you, I could stand at the sink washing a few dishes and start crying for no real reason at all. I read one woman's account of her feelings and she said, "oh hell, I even cry anymore when I send the dry cleaning out the door!" I guess that was when I laughed the hardest cause I knew she was just saying that she could cry at the drop of a hat. It is a hectic time, sending a child off to college, but the alternative is them nesting the rest of their lives at home and working at McDonalds. My oldest called home her first week at college, she wanted to quit, come home and spend time with her boyfriend. Getting her to college was no easy feat, she was not going with a scholarship in her hand, she was an average student and I had slaved hours over student loan papers, had taken her shopping for all those things she "just needed" and spent money that left our pocketbook pretty here she was wanting to come home, 1 hour away and she wanted to come home. I remember yelling at her on the phone, "YOU ARE AT COLLEGE NOW GIRL, AND THAT IS WHERE YOU ARE STAYING!" I felt just like sitting down and crying, 1-because I yelled at her and I felt terrible, 2-because she was almost 19 years old and didn't seem to appreciate one damned thing we had done for her. I was going through menopause too, and if someone looked at me the wrong way I felt like biting their head off. But anyways, I did read about Oriental woman and how they have less issues with menopausal symptoms because of their intake of soy in their diets. I know you can buy the tablets over the counter in any drug store or Walmart. You might want to ask your doctor about it too, what he knows and has read. It could be helpful. It was suggested that soy also helps with sleep at night. Maybe for some women it does. Not everything works for everyone. I tried it for awhile and it seemed to help me, but maybe that was just in my head, like a placebo effect or something.
(((HUGS))) Susanne :)

kathy b said...

ahhh feather gifts from the heavens...

Okay. So we read this thing somewhere about Native Americans having a TALKING Feather. When there was a controversy they sat in a circle. Whoever had the feather could talk. Everyone else listened. No interrupting.
We played TALKING FEATHER whenever I found one on a walk...and my family would run away and say NO NOT THE TALKING FEATHER AGAIN!

Annaboo said...

How lovely! I think inspiration and hope find us in the most unexpected moments- I've had a few in my time too.
The feathers are beautiful and something you can really treasure.

Liz said...

I love finding feathers. Ireland thinks they are the greatest. We keep them all. I've never found any as nice as your owl ones.

Change is so hard...I can see how it can be frustrating. It seems like we spend our entire lives worrying. I'm glad you're able to recognize the little things. Thanks for this post. This post will remind me to take in all of the simple gifts life has to offer.
Have a great week,

brsmaryland said...

Hi Meredith,
I totally believe in signs and I agree, the feathers are a sign of hope, that things will work out for the best. My sign usually comes in the form of a butterfly (alive, not dead!).
i hope the hormones kick in and give you some relief.
Hugs to you,

Michele Sant'Ana said...

Hi dear, your post is very intereting, i didn't have win gifts of nature in these last days rsrsr, you are lucky!

Grayseasailor said...

Meredith, I am sending you hugs, too, and am admiring the beautiful feathers you are gathering. They remind me of the wonderful image of a mother hen who shelters her chicks under her feathery wings...hugging them if you will.
And that image reminds me of two quotes that use that image to describe God's love for mankind...supporting your sense that you are receiving a universal message...a heavenly hug if you will, during all the changes in and around you.
Please feel free to e-mail me if you want to type more, because I do care about your changes and would love to encourage you if I can.
Gracie xxx

Mrs. Micawber said...

I saw a lovely feather on my Sunday walk - small and downy and beautiful. You're right, feathers are like gifts.

So sorry to hear of your rough time. I'm still hovering on the edges of the dreaded "M" - emotional, moody, some of the cognitive problems (and yet the other thing is still happening like clockwork - doesn't seem fair to have both going on at the same time.) I wish I had some words of wisdom for you - all I can think of is flavonoids and exercise. Hang in there!

Tammy@T's Daily Treasures said...

Sorry to hear you are having such a hard time with all the changes. I used to have really, really bad PMS -- mood swings like crazy and I would become a banshee. Now that my cycle is totally out of whack -- I feel so much better, so much more calm. Unfortunately, my stomach is a big bulge half the time. Can't wait to get back to walking. My doctor wanted me to take a pill to regulate my cycles, but I tried that for a week and decided to heck with it. I forgot to take the pill more than I remembered and when I read up on it, I would have to continue to take it until my period stopped altogether. I don't want to have to do that. So I am going au naturel, much to the chagrin of my doctor who says I am stubborn. :) Lovely to see all the feathers that you have collected and that you see them as a good sign. I was sitting here one morning a couple of weeks ago and from our ac vent which is in the ceiling, a small little feather came floating down -- was very strange to see. Wishing you all the best, Tammy

Annie @ knitsofacto said...

I always think of as feathers as gifts too. I must look out the ones I've picked up this year.

I can only offer sympathy re. the menopause. After years of hell, starting in my late 30s, when lets just say I was permanently very anaemic, this last year has been a doddle. Just the odd hot flush. If this is life on the other side I can cope! Let's hope your body takes you out the other side soon x