Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Not every project works out and my Mom and Dad.........

Some projects are just not meant to be, it is just a simple fact of knitting/crocheting life.  So let me introduce you to my latest major flop, readers meet the poncho that was not to be made, at least not with this yarn.

The ridiculous mess above is supposed to be Helena's V-Stitch Poncho a project that I have started at least six times in the past.  I love this pattern, I can picture myself throwing this on, like a light weight sweater and dashing off to someplace fabulous.  Now in my real life I probably won't wear it at all but I can dream can't I?  Dreaming seems to be about all I can do with this pattern because I just can't seem to get it right.

I am using beautiful silk yarn from Oasis Yarn, Icelandic Silk Seduction, bought way back in October 2009, when I was last at Rhinebeck with my sister Claudia.  How can it be almost seven years since I was at that amazing festival?   Anyway getting back on track here, I have always thought this yarn would be perfect for this pattern, and I have tried my friends, I have tried.  The thing is that no matter how easy the pattern is I just can't get the right count for the first row.  I am either making it too tight, or in this instance way, way too big!

I think in my dreamworld I have a bigger chest instead of just really wide shoulders.  I made this neckline big anticipating it would be just fine.  I kept trying it on convincing myself it would all work out, I would just make a few smaller rounds around the neck to finish the piece.  What I did not take into account, or better yet what I seemed to ignore, was that fact that this gorgeous silk yarn is heavy and it pulls the fabric down with it making the neckline expand at a scary rate.  The piece above is UGLY, the pooling of the yarn looks horrible, the size is a disaster and well there was just nothing nice to say about it with the exception that it was soft.

So after 500 yards of crocheting I finally had to have a good talk with myself and acknowledge it was not meant to be..........again!  The poncho that was not to be and I spent several hours on Sunday, frogging and wrapping into balls while watching the Rays finally get a win.  Frogging silk is just about as bad as frogging mohair, the tiny little legs of the yarn attach to everything around it making you have to tug on it to get it loose.  This tugging of course compromises the yarn on the next row, so you have a harder time the more you frog.  It seems to get worse at a exponentially fast rate until you want to just throw it all into the bin while screaming and running away.  I kept myself in check until the last three rows when I just could not take it anymore, off into the garbage bin it went.

I really do love this yarn, you can't see the real beauty of it above, but  believe me it is soft as, well.......silk!.  I am determined to make it into something else, maybe a new South Bay Shawlette?  If you know me by now you know I can't just make one of anything.  I might just get that started today.

Now that I am mentioning disasters I have to include my garden.  Yup, once again I am not happy.  When will I learn?  It starts off beautifully and then I get cutworms, or in this case a powdery fungus.  I have tried the oil/dish soap remedy with no luck at all.   I have to say the zucchini flowers are beautiful but there will be no produce happening here.  Out of my three tomato plants only one looks like it has a chance of producing anything at all.  My herbs are doing well, I am using my rosemary tonight making that yummy honey mustard chicken recipe I mentioned a few weeks ago.

Sunday was the second anniversary of my Mom passing away.  Not the easiest day, I am not sure why an anniversary day is harder but it just is.  I miss her, she was the best, always being there, telling you like she saw it but usually with a bit of humor.  Boy of boy could she make me sweat, I did not want to disappoint her.  She was proud of all of us, even if we weren't our best, and she loved us fiercely.  My Father's six month anniversary is on the 29th of this month.  I miss him, too.  I still think I am catching a glimpse of him at the grocery store.  Or when the phone rings early in the morning I think he is calling because he needs help.  I am still working on his estate (which sounds a whole lot bigger than it is).  I have spent the last month trying to get his homeowners insurance canceled, they have been ridiculous in all the documents they have requested.  Each person I talk to has something different to request or say. It has been much harder to cancel this policy than to sell his actual condo.   I have not been happy with them, and actually have lost my patience many times on the phone.  I am keeping my fingers crossed that after yet another 40 minutes on the phone today it has all gone through at last.

I have a busy week ahead of me, I will check in when I can.  Wishing you all the best week.


Linda @ A La Carte said...

At least you keep trying and if a project fails, you move on to something else! I know the 2yr anniversary was hard. I don't think we ever get over losing our parents. Big Hugs to you Meredith!


elns said...

I really do love the dream place of patterns/knitting. I've been there Mere. I hope that the next project comes to fruition in the way you'd like it to, but it is a journey isn't it. And the day dream. It's nice until it's not.

My heart is with you while you remember your parents.

Wishing you a good week and some good stitching. xoxo

kristieinbc said...

It's so funny that you have posted about a failed project. I think that is going to be the subject of my next post. But in my case I kept going until it was completely finished. That picture of your parents is very special. Your dad was a very handsome guy, and your mom was beautiful. The anniversary of my dad's death has gotten easier to cope with as time has gone on. I hope that will hold true for you as well.

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh .......sounds like you have had a rough week.

I can't believe that insurance company is giving you such a hard time.

Hope it all gets straightened out soon.

Gracie Saylor said...

You have been in a tangle for sure, Mere. I am sorry your poncho refused to be, and your garden developed powdery fungus, and you had to wrestle with insurance. We have been warring against slugs already. Did you know they think Hydrangea bush leaves are delicious...even with tabasco spray on them! Hmmph... The photo of your folks is lovely. Thanks for sharing your good memories of them. You are a wonderful testament to their good parenting. You are gifted, generous, loving, hard working, with a good sense of humor...and so smart to recycle your project yarn from a project that disappointed you to reuse it for a dream project that is bound to produce joy :) Wishing you peace in the midst of your busyness. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Judy S. said...

Hope you can find the right pattern for your yarn. That's really frustrating, especially frogging "sticky" stuff. I've had the mohair experience, and it was awful! I still miss my folks, and they've been gone a long time. Now we are the oldest generation and not nearly smart enough for that role! Hugs to you; hope the rest of your week goes WELL!

Betsy said...

That looks like some beautiful yarn to me Meredith. I even like the pooling. I know what you mean about a project not working out though. I love Pammy Sue's blanket from Scotty's Place blog. I have the same pattern and I tried it a few weeks ago. What a mess! Her's is gorgeous but I'm reading something terribly wrong in the pattern. I ended up ripping it all out but I still want to try again. I sure hope you are able to get the estate finally settled. It makes it hard to adjust and grieve when you're dealing with all of the "stuff". It was my Dad's birthday on the 23rd. He would have been 93. He's been gone over 10 years. My Mom would be 94 this year and she's been gone since 1990. I still miss them even though all of us kids didn't have much of a relationship with our Dad, he was still my Dad. I pray for you and Claudia every day Meredith. I know from personal experience just how hard this is for the two of you.
Alex is recovering from his surgery today. He has an airboot on. He can't take it off until he goes back to the surgeon next Wednesday. He is feeling NO pain at the moment. It's almost funny except I know that it will hit him soon, either during the night or tomorrow morning. Meanwhile he's talking nonsense and is very happy. :-). I sure hope this fixes his pain. The doctor told him he has osteoarthritis in his heel and ankle from the bones being broken so many times while walking. I do know that pain won't go away, but maybe the re-breaking of the bones will stop now. Thank you for thinking of him dear Meredith. I truly appreciate it.
I'll be harvesting some rhubarb tomorrow and planting my green beans. I sure hope the frosts are done for the season!

Blondie's Journal said...

I think you really have a lot of courage to post your difficulties in this project...you might be helping a lot of others and that's always commendable. I have some of the same issues you have in size...wide shoulders like a football halfback but also boobs and it makes me look very top heavy in comparison to a thin lower body. Who's happy with their shape? Ha! ;-D

I am so sorry that the anniversaries of losing your parents is here. My mom has been gone fifteen years and I'm`okay with it...she is a happy memory and I can think back and smile. My dad has been gone 3 years. My thoughts of him are harder as he had to carry on without her and it was more upsetting all around. I feel bad you have to deal with all of the paperwork and dealing in settling the estate alone. I was so lucky that I have 6 siblings and we all pitched in from caring for our parents to selling their possessions in the end and working through the red tape. It's tiring and not something I would wish on anyone. Hang in there, Mere. Soon you will have time to relax and simply embrace those memories.


mamasmercantile said...

I can only imagine your pain Meredith, I am blessed and still have my parents alive although not necessarily the parents I remember, it is hard sometimes...sending you a hug.
Such a shame about the poncho project, particularly with such a great yarn. Its obviously just not meant to be. Take care.

Tammy@T's Daily Treasures said...

I've had to pitch yarn many times that refused to frog properly. Sooner or later the right project will come along for that yarn. That's a lovely photo of your parents. Never easy dealing with loss. Time eases the pain but the hole in your heart never completely heals. Hugs and blessings, Tammy

Janet said...

What a beautiful picture of your parents. The fact that you miss them so much is evidence of the close and loving relationship you had with them.

The silk sounds like a gorgeous yarn. I find the more special the yarn is, the harder it is to find the right pattern and feel happy with it. South Bay Shawlette would be a good one to try. It's a lovely pattern that works with any yarn and colouring.

Have a good week. Thinking of you. X

kathy b said...


Thank you for reminding me that ripping out silk isn't easy. Sorry about the frog. I think it just wants to be something else, and you'll find happiness with it in the future.
Missing you parents is lovely. I'm struggling with my mom's sad existence in the nursing home. I know I'll miss her later, but her existence seems so cruel....

Hugs to LIL buddy!

Araignee said...

Such a sweet tribute to your parents. They were a lovely couple.
As for the naughty pattern, I certainly get it. I am on Featherweight Cardi #2 as #1 was a disaster of epic proportions. Of course, I am already starting to doubt #2. Not good.

Jo said...

As you say, there are just some projects which aren't meant to be, no matter how hard we try, they just don't come good. It's a shame though as the poncho looks lovely and the yarn sounds beautiful, I'm sure you'll create something else with it that's beautiful though. Anniversaries are very hard to deal with, aren't they? I know so many people who say that time is a great healer, and it is to some extent, we learn to live with the pain of losing someone special, but it's just as hard today as it always has been knowing they're gone. It will be seventeen years in July since my sister passed away and I'm still grieving, I think I always will be. I'm sorry you're having so many problems with your dad's insurance company, you'd think they'd make these things as simple as possible considering the pain those who are dealing with them are going through at the time, but there's so much red tape and jumping through hoops to go through for what seems like a simple request. I hope you get it sorted out soon.

Karen said...

It sounds like you've had a week of things coming undone -- knitting, gardening and insurance. Bleh. I will keep my fingers crossed that the latter gets resolved for you soon. Hang in there, my friend! Big hug to you!

handmade by amalia said...

Poor you! Deep breaths, Mer, deep breaths.

Cache-Mire said...

Oh, I've been there with the "just doesn't fit" dilemma! I almost finished an entire sweater when I finally admitted to myself that it just wasn't going to work. Will we ever learn? Love the yarn and I'm sure you will come up with the perfect project! ~Terri

Kris said...

Meredith, what a lovely wedding photo of your parents! Those anniversary dates are always hard. It has been 12 years since losing my Dad, and every single time, it gets me.
I shall be keeping you in my thoughts!
About the poncho.....I think it looks great! I am trying to teach myself how to knit socks using magic loop! I have done one pair using DPN's and find them so cumbersome. I want to try magic loop.
Your garden is probably suffering from too much humidity. Which in Florida, is going to be hard to avoid. Try to cut back on the watering, and when you do water, try not to hit the leaves of the plant.
My garden is really taking sweet time to get going this year. This puzzles me?
I think of you often, even though I am not blogging as much.
xo Kris

Joyful said...

So sorry about the poncho and the frogging issues. I hope you find something else to make with the beautifully soft silk yarn that goes much better. Sorry too about feeling the loss of your mom and dad. It is still quite recently that you lost both of them. Big hugs. As for the insurer, they sound ridiculous. Here all one probably needs is a death certificate and then you are good to go. I hope it all gets straightened out today. xx

Teresa Kasner said...

Mere, I'm so sorry that poncho didn't turn out like you dreamed it would.. I noticed that the pattern shows the stripes vertical.. I guess that particular yarn didn't pan out to stripe like that. Maybe you can find some yarn that is dyed so the stripes are longer? Don't give up! :-) I feel your pain on the zucchini. We planted one and it had flowers but the zukes only got like tiny and then didn't go farther.. which amazed me as zucchini is notoriously easy to grow! Your parents were a beautiful couple.. I'm glad they were so nice you have good memories. My memories are rather messed up as my mom took us away from our dad when I was 12 and... I have to try to have positive memories. ((hugs)), Teresa :-)

Amy at love made my home said...

A beautiful photo of your beloved parents. I do hope that you are able to finish with the paperwork before too much longer, insurance companies especially can be very frustrating can't they. Sorry that your yarn isn't working out how you wanted it to, very frustrating isn't it. Hope the veggies don't do too badly either! Hugs my dear! xx

Andrea Ostapovitch said...

That is a beautiful photo of your parents. I am so sorry to hear that things have not gone smoothly in trying to settle the estate. How can a person grieve with all that worry hanging over their heads?!
That looks like it could have been a wonderful shawl! That's too bad it didn't turn out. I've never actually tried a pattern before, so I have not a clue. I'm one of those that has only ever crocheted blankets and scarves, oh, and a few little pumpkins. I could see myself eventually getting more involved though.
I hope your week ends better than it has started,
All my best,

Amber said...

It is so frustrating when projects and gardens don't go as anticipated. I've just learned that it's just the chance you take, and it happens to everyone from time to time (which makes it a bit easier for me to deal with since I don't feel like a lonely loser. lol.) I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time with your dad's insurance. Bad customer service is horrible.

Christina said...

Some projects are just not meant to be. I am sure you'll find the perfect use for your gorgeous yarn when the time is right. I have been thinking of you Meredith, on the anniversary of your mum's passing. I still sometimes pick up the phone to call my dad, or I dream that he is visiting. He has been gone nearly 14 years now. The anniversary is this coming Saturday. I am sending you some hugs, keep them in your purse and get one out when you most need it. xx

Babajeza said...

It's impossible to get everything right. Or right the first time. What are you going to do with the silk yarn once you have frogged the poncho? ;-)

But then I think we should not waste too much energy on a project that's not a success. Life is hard enough. Good luck with the insurance and all. There will be a solution finally.

We know that life is a circle from birth to death. However knowing (and accepting), experiencing and feeling are completely different. Hugs, Regula

Caffeine Girl said...

I hope your week isn't too crazy.
Some projects just aren't meant to be. I stay away from fibers with too much silk or alpaca because I'm afraid I don't understand their properties that well.
Neither Keith nor I have lost a parent, but are in that totally different zone where we are dealing with money issues, health issues, emotional issues. It's really hard either way, I think. We don't deal with aging or death very well in our society, and I think that makes both issues even harder than they already are.
I do know how it feel to miss you dad. My dad is still here in body, but dementia has taken away my "real" father. I always adored him and it's painful to watch him struggle with his declining intellectual abilities.
On that cheerful note...the weekend is coming closer!

Ingrid K. said...

Dear Meredith,

I can feel your frustration, some things can be so annoying! You are right about the frogging, ugh, it is almost impossible with such fine fibres.... Well done for all your perseverance, I'm sure you will find a good use for it.

Hope the insurance gets sorted out soon and things will calm down. I can only imagine what it feels like for you, having lost your parents. I am blessed that my mum is still alive, she turns 88 on saturday and we are going to visit her in Germany, yay!!! :) I'm going to give her the flower shawl I made.

Love to you and your lovely family,
Ingrid xx

Lynne said...

I think that yarn is trying to tell you it wants to be something else. Frustrating though, when you want it to work out so bad. Well you get an A for effort my dear. After starting and restarting a knitted shawl pattern in fingering weight yarn at least 5 times this week, I finally put it away. So annoying.
My parents are needing more and more help lately. It's getting overwhelming. Every time the phone rings, I'm thinking Now what? I know someday soon I will be missing them like you miss your parents now :(
Hope you get the estate settled soon. That doesn't sound like fun at all!
But another South Bay sounds relaxing.......

Nana Go-Go said...

Yay I can comment! Works at some, not at others! I recently gave away a whole cardigan which I'd nearly gotten to the end of (only a small part of second sleeve to finish). I just. Couldn't stand the sight of it any longer so donated it to a Save the Children charity shop, where I know the lady who knits lots of stuff for the charity. She's always grateful for my 'cast off' s' or 'cast on's'!the only saving grace about that particular project was that it taught me how to knit 'top down' so for that I was grateful. Those anniversaries come round very quickly. I totally get it about seeing your Dad in the supermarket or thinking he's on the phone. Have a good week, Meredith.Xavier