While I wanted to celebrate a very special birthday yesterday the day was overshadowed by the news that over 50% of the population in the United States have had the right to make decisions over their own body and health taken away. I will forever remember this day with this news, not that Little Buddy turned 11, but this horrific news.
Pro Choice or Pro Life are interesting terms to me. I am very much pro life and at the same time I am emphatically, without a doubt, pro choice. I see a side of this that many of you don't. A side that is going to grow and grow and create more and more problems for our society. I don't understand how you can be pro life but believe that assault rifles have a place in our society. We can protect a bundle of cells with no viability but children can get mowed down with their heads severed in school because it is our right to buy assault rifles.
I am pro life because I believe that all children should be cared for with Universal Healthcare instead of having services stripped away. I see the children whose parents can't afford healthcare or even food. One family I know fed their child carrot water because they could not afford formula, obviously this boy will have developmental and intellectual issues the rest of his life due to malnutrition, he is suffering every day. There will be more of this to come, a lot more, yet we are forcing women to have babies that they know they cannot take care of financially, physically, mentally or emotionally. Babies they can't even feed or afford diapers for. Our system even wants to reduce school lunches, sometimes the only real food a child gets all day. Can you imagine what will happen to all these babies as they grow up without proper nutrition?
I am pro life and I believe in supporting children, and their mothers, no matter their age, with good mental health services. Those services are also being cut, everywhere. Can you imagine a 12 year old being raped by a family member and having to carry a child to term? Giving birth to her brother? Her sister? Her niece or nephew? Trauma based care is so hard to get with the lack of services available, the lack of good mental health professionals that get paid a fraction of their worth. How is this child going to ever survive this on top of the abuse she has already suffered? How is her child, who will most assuredly be significantly delayed for the rest of its life, how does this child make it? Where will the money come from for services to help this little one?
I am pro life but I think having to carry a child to term at the expense of your own physical health is so ridiculous I can barely comprehend it. How many women are going to leave their children motherless because a bunch of non viable cells or a child that will never live outside her womb are more important then the physical children she already has. She will leave this earth and leave her children without a mother due to no decision of her own.
I am pro life and I cannot fathom why we are forcing more children into this world with no thought to climate change and the affects climate issues have on our ability to feed these babies with safe foods, clean water and temperatures that they can tolerate. How can a mother provide for this baby with rents skyrocketing and no childcare benefits?
In the world where we in the United Sates are so ranked so high as far as infant and mother mortality, how is this situation going to improve that? It is all going to become much, much worse. Women will die, their babies will die. Are you ready for that?
I am pro life but I see the children who have been thrown up against walls so hard their retinas burst. They are physically abused so bad they sometimes don't even make it, and when they do they are barely living. Do you not see how this is going to happen more and more frequently because the choice to have a child was not theirs?
Do you think this affects men? Absolutely not, it is always going to be the mothers responsibility to raise a child. Will men have to pay support if they have sex until they know a child has not been created? Frankly, many of them don't support the children they know they have. Will men have to have vasectomies at the age they can start having children, what is the 10 or 11 to ensure no one gets pregnant? And only have it reversed when they become responsible adults? No, it is always, always going to be the woman/girl/child who has to handle the decisions forced on her.
There are over 100,000 children in foster care, almost 120,000 actually, that number is about to skyrocket. The system we have in place is already overwhelmed. Are you going to adopt one of these children? Are you pro life enough to turn your world upside down and bring these troubled and often emotionally and/or physically challenged children into your home? I can talk this way because I did. I did bring a child into my home who was exposed to drugs and alcohol on top of all the brain damage he suffered due to the decisions of his birth mother. He is lucky to have found a home. Are you willing to provide one? Many of these kids end up in residential facilities or group homes with no real family, or are often abused in the very homes they were placed in for safety, they then drift out of the system with nothing to help them. The cycle will then repeat itself with the next generation. Get ready my friends, because this is all going to get a lot worse for these babies who will grow up with little support. Where are your prayers then? Are they helping these poor children?
I am pro life, I am pro choice, but this has just made my job a whole lot harder. The numbers of trauma based children, physically challenged children and babies, drug exposed kids, and babies exposed to excess alcohol is about to skyrocket. Will you be willing to pay more taxes to help these kids get the services they need? I'm not talking a prayer service or a local diaper drive. How are you going to dedicate your life to helping these children having children, or the mothers who will suffer emotionally, mentally and often physically to have a child that they were not prepared to have.
I have already dedicated my life to this, what are you going to do to help besides pray and rejoice that women/girls/children have had a fundamental right taken away from them? A fundamental right that will be cataclysmic to society as a whole and cataclysmic to the very children you are rejoicing that will be born. Will you be wanting your daughter, granddaughter, niece or little girl next door to have a baby when she has been raped? Will you tell her to lay back and enjoy it like one politician has said?
What is next? Imprisoning women who have had a miscarriage? Not allowing women access to birth control?
Let this sink in, an 18 year old has more rights to buy an assault riffle than a woman/girl or child has making choices and decisions about her own body.
It doesn't stop here, and when your particular fundamental right gets taken away remember this day, June 24, 2022. This is not when it started but this is when it became a reality.
I couldn't agree more. Listening to the news last night from the UK all I could think of was the first episodes of 'The Handmaid's Tale.' when women's rights began to be taken away. (I had to stop watching after a few episodes because it got too intense for me.)
Thank you, thank you for writing this post. I've been in a heartsick state since yesterday, over this ruling. I fear this is only the beginning. I was 22 when Roe v Wade was passed, so many in my generation have never really known life without this law. If the justices who voted for this think they are putting a stop to abortion, they are so wrong. Women will be returning to the time when they took matters into their own hands, and many will die or be permanently changed, both physically and mentally. This is just so wrong. I saw Rep. Katie Porter on a news program last night. She said, "When Republicans tell you what they're going to do, believe them." Chilling. They and the Supreme Court are coming for women's rights across the board. I am, like you, pro life, but also pro choice. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Thank you, Meredith! You said it all with passion and truth from experience.
As a high school teacher in a large urban school, I saw the results of a life lived in unstable homes, poverty, abuse, and struggle every day. I also saw young girls juggling a pregnancy and these circumstances while trying to attend school and not fall behind. Where were the fathers? Good question.
No one is *for* abortion. What we stand for is a woman’s right to make choices about her own body, LIKE A MAN IS ABLE TO. We are, as you said, pro-life, especially a life free of preventable hardships.
Pregnancy starts with the man. Regulate his body.
Failing that—and isn’t that a pipe dream?—we need to get out and vote like our lives depend on it. Because they do.
This has made made headlines way over here on the other side of the world.
We are outraged on your behalf.
All I can see is women dying as they used to in my youth.
My heart bleeds for you.
Well written, Meredith.
The thing that makes it even more bizarre is when Republicans said in terms of making Covid vaccine mandatory.....my body, my choice.
Great post. I'm pro life too--who is AGAINST life? But that's my choice! So I'm pro choice!
I wish I had the brilliant skills, knowledge and language to write this. It is exactly as I feel. Thank you for putting it so eloquently. Jeanie -- another of the angry and heartbroken.
Thank you for adding your voice of experience and real life to this issue. Funny how policy-makers never ask for input from the people on the front lines who must live with the decisions of the powerful. They'd rather listen to their donors or MALE religious leaders.
Thank you so much for this post. I've been crying all day. Between gun violence and loss of civil liberties, I no longer want to live in this country. It just amazes and baffles me how backward we've become. And I feel helpless, although I will continue to write to my legislators and vote to try to change things for the better.
Strong post, Meredith. Thank you for this. I feel like you have expressed many of my feelings today.
I am worried where as you said this will lead for you and the rest of the world I do hope they don’t follow I know there are large groups in Australia who want the same thing but don’t look at the full conquenses of this decision I would never have an abortion but that is my decision not another persons so yes in one respect I am pro life but a life of dignity for all.as you said it all so well thankyou ignore any negative feedback you get from your post know those that think understand and endorse you.if others don’t like what you say they can go elsewhere.
Thank you for expressing exactly how I feel.
Perfectly said. Guns have more rights than women anymore and it's a sad world because of it. An abortion is something you won't know you need until you need it and now that decision is being made for you by someone else. As a mother of sons and now 5 grandsons I refuse to say this is a woman's issue. I know many young men of my son's generation that had their lives upended by one mistake made at a very young age with the wrong partner. 18 years of child support impacts their future relationships and career choices in a terrible way. I've seen no good coming from forcing these young partners together. It never ends well. I am furious.
Well written. I agree with every word.
Alison in Wales x
I'm on the same page as you, Meredith. Well written post.
Happy Birthday little Buddy 😘😘
What you say is spot on Meredith, so well written, I'm with you in everything you have said. Xx
I agree with you. If we say yes to children, there comes a lot of responsability which the politicians do not take.
There will be lots of abortions done very dangerously because it is illigal. If something is forbidden, it doesn't mean it doesn't happen anymore ... But you know what? I think it is the plan to harm humanity and societies. The Western world is going down.
Thank you for putting my feelings out there so eloquently. I came to read this via your sister's blog.
Excellent post! Thank you. How did LB get to be 11 so fast? That looks like a yummy cupcake!
I wholeheartedly agree with you but that will not stop the stupidity. I have a physical condition that made me miscarry my first two pregnancies. I have an in-law who feels I must have aborted those babies because their family has superior genes and therefore I would not have miscarried. A doctor once saw my two 'spontaneous abortions' in my records and chewed me out because he did not realize that meant miscarriage, he thought I had chosen to get rid of those pregnancies. Stupid rules and always will.
Beautifully said. You should send this as a letter to the editor in those states restricting abortion.
Thank you for all you said here in this post! I too feel angry, and helpless, and alarmed, and frustrated, and worn out. It is very hard not to be pessimistic, but knowing that there are others out there who feel as I do helps.
You have nailed it Meredith. Your words are wiser than many. Jo xx
It's unbelievable that it's come to this, I can hardly believe it. You have expressed it so eloquently and from a very educated standpoint, in that you see the harsh truth of what happens in families where a parent cannot cope with a child. I was thinking about it today and I was rather lost for words. How will women manage? It is just horrific. CJ xxxxx
Very powerful writing. Your words resonated. Umpteen years ago I had just started university as a mature student.
A few months after I started, there was a huge event on campus two famous people (both men) were discussing abortion. It floored me that no one thought it odd that this discussion was between two men, not one woman was speaking. I feel these are scary times.
I am standing up and cheering and clapping for you and what you wrote...bravo, bravo! I agree with you 100%.
And, happy birthday to your beautiful boy!
PS - may I share this on FB, Meredith? Or would you rather I didn't? Thank you!
Agree deeply with EVERYTHING you say. You come from a place of such profound experience and insight into the situation, and you write so incredibly eloquently and with such compassion. I wish that more people could see your words and hear from those like you, who see and work with the consequences of what happens when things go wrong in society. Meanwhile, happy happy birthday to LB - he is so, so lucky to have you as his mom xxoo Frances
A sad day for women in the United States and one that will have unimaginable repercussions - Meanwhile here in Glasgow the (still) small group of men praying for women outside the reproductive and maternal health clinic will feel emboldened. A sad day indeed.
But on a different level, a happy day also, a happy birthday for a little boy who is not so little anymore.
Sending you hugs xx
Thank you so much for taking the time to write down your feelings and your generous experience. This is really well done and while feeling terrible, made me feel better, because it was just so RIGHT. I am not on the front lines like you are but I work in public health and see every day how important it is to have the voices of the people in the front lines in our decision-making. Happy birthday to your guy, who would be having a different birthday without you. love,
Meredith, I hope you do not mind, but I have put a link to this piece on my blog post today.
Your not so little any more guy, is as cute as ever. :-)
A late comment, but one that has been bedeviling me all weekend. I am curious: How many babies (born with developmental delays, physical anomalies, etc.) will our Supreme Court justices and their “good, decent, God fearing spouses) be willing to support, adopt, until these. children become age 18? I think all of these pro life people should be willing to put their shoulders to the wheel (and their money where their mouths are) and walk the walk!
Happy Birthday to dear Buddy, he's growing up to be a handsome young man. Take care x
This is SO well stated, Meredith. I couldn't agree with you more. May I share this on Facebook?
this post is a tour de force!
I don't know anything anymore.
it's as if we live in a foreign land and time. cruelty and meanness.
we've learned NOTHING. YOU who have dedicated your life's work...
to picking up the pieces and trying to make sense of their lives...
YOU who are literally In the Trenches every day. I'm at a loss for words.
maybe when all those OLD men who pass the laws are dead and gone...
will there be a magnificent voice like yours to help the women of this country?
you have great courage Meredith. xo
Thoughtful and articulate writings Meredith. I live in Australia but watch the happenings in the US. We have conservative politicians here who would love to follow some of your changes. No luck with rolling back our gun control laws - the people vote against them.
The same would happen with proposed changes to issues of women’s health.
I don’t understand why so many women are anti abortion. It is not compulsory. If you believe a few cells are a life, don’t have an abortion, yourself. Why deny other women the right to their belief?
There is only one way to change anything……VOTE.
And how many women who must carry babies to term will be vilified as "Welfare Queens" or "morally bankrupt" by the very people who set all this in motion? Never, ever, EVER tell me you are "pro-life" if you aren't willing to protect all lives.
Today I read a story about a 10-year-old in Ohio who was denied an abortion. TEN. YEARS. OLD. Yep, you're really doing some top-notch protection there.
Happy Birthday! Hope you have a great day!
Happy Birthday Meredith - your sweet sister C. shared that it was her 'sister's birthday' on her post today. Love and Hugs.
Happy Birthday, Meredith! Best of luck for a wonderful year!
Happy Birthday Meredith!
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